In Case You Were Wondering
I successfully broke my lease and reassigned my apartment within one day (it is a competitive housing market and there are plenty of people desperate for 900 sq. ft. two bedroom apartment, even if they're cold with temperamental water pipes) and am now facing the prospect of homelessness as it is just as competitive to get a large studio or one bedroom for under $1500 in a safe, grocery-convenient neighborhood no more than 30 minutes away from campus by foot or bus (seriously). I've put in applications, but am praying that $1200 apartments are less competitive than Soros Fellowships, which I am apparently not good at getting. I must find housing and pack up and move my things by Feb. 1. While researching, attending school and confronting the advisor I've been avoiding because I am the Worst Grad Student Ever.
So, unfortunately, I'm not going to D.C.--until spring or summer.
I am a mess of stress, very emotional and anxious and slightly depressed about moving away from a house that I loved and hated. The stress of moving has given me enough stress that all of my law school diseases are back: acid reflux, excessive sleepiness during the day, insomnia at night, headaches, and a tendency to be confessional on the blog but obfuscatory in real life. I have also, I've noticed, started acting out and inflicting weirdness on others, so that I can act normal towards the people I interact with on a too consistent basis who might be alarmed by such behavior. I have broken down in tears three times today, drowning my stress/sorrows in emotionally manipulative movies and pinot noir, occasionally screaming "augh!!" and leaving frustrated, frantic messages in different long-term-used-to-weird-friends' voicemails and then curling into fetal positions at various points. In other words, attributable to Jurisprudential Boy of Wonder, being a big bag o' freaky.
More on this later, along with a movie review of Juno, which I liked, mostly.