Seventeen Syllables for Seven Stages of Hell

Some law Thesis Hell Haiku for you:


Thesis hell: dull pain
Caused by dull, bad writing.
Hope I graduate.


My insomnia,
arrhythmia, reflux: Ow.
Stress, then early death.


Ten hours, only
Two pages. Don't press "delete."
It is good enough.


I have writer's block
The size of a damn mack truck.
Kill me now, won't you?


Life as a movie,
Mine: They shoot writers, don't they?
I wish that they did.


Sometimes I misread
"Thesis Hell" as "This is Hell"
No difference, right?


The Bluebook makes me
Hate the color blue, and books.
But I hate me more.


Fuck footnotes, and fuck
Those law review editors.
I'm going to bed.